Most often a period of suffering and pain provides time for deep contemplation and if we're open to it...a period of healing. Suffering is a vehicle for us to step outside of ourselves and see that we are not the only ones who suffer. And that our suffering is not nearly as severe as many. This suffering has taken me to a place of unwavering gratitude. I find a blessing in almost everything around me...still working on that almost part. I'm finding that I am surrounded by amazing people, teachers in every face I come across. Eyes, words and hands helping to heal my open wounds with love and empathy. Gratitude.
One teacher of mine, Tricia, said to me, "God teaches us to hold on loosely to things in our life because you never know when you have to let go." This is sometimes hard to hear, but I realize how attached I've become to certain things and it's time to "not take it too seriously"...thank you, Kyle, another wonderful teacher.
So, this period of great healing has brought me back to the mat with more discipline, more calmness and more of a feeling of necessity for the practice. "To become a great teacher, one must practice more than teach..." thank you, Victoria.